deeeeaaan:

celestial-sexhair:

thesassycat:

what if all the scenerios we make up in our head are actually real events happening in an alternative universe and we’re actually connecting with our alternate self’s mind

you just broke the fourth wall

well fuck my AU selves are having a hell of a time

algrenion:

overlypolitebisexual:

whenever i see these post-apocalyptic films set in the USA where everyone is pretty much just killing each other with no mention of other nations i always just assume that the rest of the world is fine and has learnt how to resume life as normal

 

thehartsandthehelbig:

scarecrowframe:

faultinourfantasies:

SYSTEM ALERT: The metaphor is in his hand

Wait wait wait. His girlfriend needs assistance breathing and he smokes next to her? Hahahahahahaha what the fuck is this

sugarpumpkin:

if someone asks for nudes just tell them this and they’ll leave you alone

sugarpumpkin:

if someone asks for nudes just tell them this and they’ll leave you alone

jesus:

peklaxdog:

angel:

asian:

ejective:

if lust is a sin and im horny 24/7 does that mean i sin 24/7

I don’t mind sinning more and help you out ;)

you two need jesus

i dont think jesus was into threesomes

you don’t know me

trillow:

"hello 911 i’d like to report a murder in th-" "haha, wow you’re a little snitch. hold on a sec. HEY DAVE, CHECK OUT THIS FUCKIN SNITCH ON LINE THREE"

ridge:

omg

ridge:

omg